When my husband and I went in for the infamous ultra sounds that announced boy or girl, it was an immediate sigh of relief when they said boy both times. I didn't quite understand the full why at the time, but truth is I was petrified to have a girl. It was not the baby phase or the toddler years. My mind flash forwarded right to the pre-teen and teenage years. That scared the heck out of me!
All sorts of images ran through my head...
My awkward self lashing out at my mom for um, I don't even know what.
My aunt trying to fix my hair for a semi-formal and boy did she hear how awful she was at doing hair.
Being called the b-word in middle school for something I did not do.
Having being quiet and shy misinterpreted for yup the b-word.
Coaching 7th and 8th grade girls basketball as a 23 year old and being dumbfounded (and wanting to run the other way) by the arguments the girls where having.
I grew up with two brothers. I know how they work. I can handle the rough housing. I get the potty mouth humor. I can be as sarcastic as the next one. We can do this. Yeah, It is a boy, twice!
It was not until I came upon my mid-thirties where this started to change -- years after all of my self development and over analyzing myself and my issues. I decided to go for a walk one day. Just walk. No music. No cell phone. Just me allowing my mind to free flow. During that walk, something magical happened. I had that moment. That moment where I thought, "Wow, you are finally here. You are you and it feels awesome." These empowered thoughts were quickly followed by, "Wait, how can I help other girls feel this sooner. It shouldn't have taken my 35 years to feel this way. What can I do to make a difference?"
About 2 weeks after that walk, I was sitting with my neighbor. She brought up a non-profit program, Girls on the Run. After a brief conversation, we were off and rolling! In just a short couple of months, what at times seemed like was going to be a challenging road to get Girls on the Run to Charleston doesn't seem so challenging anymore. It was even more empowering to see all the women volunteer with such great enthusiasm to be apart of this cause.
All my initial fears of the doctor saying, "It's a girl!" have seemed to disappear. There is a reason for everything. It is my job to not ignore the journey that lies ahead. I look forward to embracing this Girls on the Run journey especially when surrounded by the incredible women that will be taking this journey with me!
Stay Tuned: There is so much more to the coming of this journey. I look forward to giving my mom the biggest shout out of all and the wonderful day I just had with my Gaia Fit family raising money for Girls on the Run Charleston!